Trust and Vulnerability
These are two important things that are necessary for a very happy life. To grow, we must learn to trust and embrace the vulnerability that comes with it.
“I trust nobody” is a fallacy you hear people repeat ever so often. But when you board a plane, you’re trusting the pilots to safely fly you to your destination. When you eat at your favourite restaurant, you are trusting that the chefs did abide by every food safety regulation. When you drop off your child at the daycare, you’re trusting the care providers to keep your kid safe. And ofcourse, when you visit your doctor, you’re trusting he’d be right with the medication.
You might be thinking these are situations of passive trust, where you have no choice but to completely abandon yourself, your fate in the hands of someone else. That’s true. But just as these situations can sometimes be unavoidable, you need a certain degree of active trust to live your life to the fullest and enjoy what the world has to offer. Active trust is when you willing place your faith “in the reliability, truth, ability or strength of someone or something”.
When you trust, you make yourself vulnerable. You open yourself up to the possibility of being hurt (many times by the people you love). But that’s nothing compared to the beauty of life that you will definitely miss out on if you don’t allow yourself to trust.
In many ways, not trusting is perhaps the clearest sign that you’re unable to leave the past behind you; a sign that you are unable to forgive; a sign that you prefer to be shackled by the burdens of your past experiences. Yes, trusting again will demand that you don’t see the wrongdoings of someone that hurt you as a reflection of humankind, that you don’t project your own insecurities onto someone (or some people) with whom you could form a very beautiful relationship. It’s a big ask, but it’s the only way to allow yourself to live a beautiful life.
If you’ve been hurt and have given up on love, I have this to say to you: to love again is to trust again. When you love truly, it’s true that you open yourself up to pain and heartbreak, but you also open yourself up to the rich, colourful and magnificent world that only people in love get to enjoy. A world whose peace, brightness and adventure will always result in a satisfying experience that will more than compensate for whatever pain you’ve had to endure as a result of making yourself vulnerable.
To grow, we must learn to trust and embrace the vulnerability that comes with it.
Trusting is a risk. But it is a risk worth taking.
Are you finding it hard to trust someone who let you down? Start by taking some time to heal. Then trust yourself to find a way to love and believe again. Finally, forgive and jump back in, with the full awareness of your vulnerability, but with the faith that it will always be worth it at the end.
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